Far Behind

I saw a reflection in your eye
a picture of courage
A classy lacy veil draped upon my tears of joy
A man high as a tower revealing my beauty
I sank my teeth so deep
I swallowed blood
wanting the taste to linger into wine
My senses imprisoned in a box
I gave them away
Away and dreaming I fell into your shelter
My love, I gave me away
burns like ash, life is what's left
Cobwebs tangle your fingers so numb to touch
the knots ripple my calm pond of a heart
I should've studied astronomy
maybe I would've learned about your planet
My waves crash even further
and you whisper
moan desperations
I should've listened closer
like the urgencies my body was denied of
I now deny trust
Sugar turns to acid when we are bad lab partners
You shouldn't have gotten an A
I ride this beautiful horse into Texas
through the fields of moving on
I see a smile waiting for me
at the end of all time
a familiar face
a familiar crowd of strangers
I realize I deserve it. He plays the piano.
And I love myself.
My sunlight will never again
shine through your night
only on the other side, in Japan
where you can't see me
You are not a miracle
so you are blind those ways
I'm sleepy, worked too hard on us
destroyed my will to keep trying
Don't want to convice myself that
you deserve it anymore
I know your secrets; and you don't.
It's safe to say "the end"
of the road is a dark tunnel
we still need to walk through it
only now
I let the blackness of tomorrow guide my way
E, you are far behind today.